THE ADVOCATE 69
VOL. 78 PART 1 JANUARY 2020
I ASKED FOR HELP, I RECEIVED HELP AND THAT HAS MADE ALL THE
I was born into a good home in a good neighbourhood with a lot of advantages.
We were not a particularly close family; my dad worked a lot and my
mom was busy in the community. They had high expectations for me and
my older sister. I mostly lived up to those expectations. I was rewarded for
successes and less than excellence was met with silence or perhaps “you’ll
do better next time”. I did not mind at the time, at least not that I remember.
I was, however, highly anxious and tremendously competitive. I thought
that this was good, as it drove me to get good grades and to make all the
teams. I did not know that this was not normal or healthy; it was all I knew.
I suppose my parents suspected something was wrong and they send me to
a private school—I now gather it was for the discipline. Again, I did not
know any better, so getting the strap or getting beaten seemed like proper
discipline. I did move to public school near home and I kept doing better at
school and in sports.
I went to university, played varsity sports, got good grades and had lots
of friends. I had always drank and occasionally to excess, but it was pretty
normal for university. It also enabled me to meet people and to socialize
normally. It was not a problem; if anything, it was positive. I also experienced
a lot of anxiety. I did not consider it a bad thing because it motivated
me to work and strive to do better, and then better. When I got to law school
The Lawyers Assistance Program is an independent organization of members of the legal community (lawyers, judges
families and support staff). We provide peer support and referral services to help people deal with personal problems,
including alcohol and drug dependence, stress, anxiety and depression. We are volunteers and staff committed to providing
confidential, compassionate and knowledgeable outreach, support and education. We seek to foster collegiality among our
peers and to promote health and well-being in our community. You can reach LAP by telephone at 604-685-2171, toll-free
at 1-888-685-2171 or via the LAP website: <www.lapbc.com>.